The Resting Place » I think I was lost for awhile

I think I was lost for awhile

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I shared the other day that God is doing a new thing on my heart…removing another layer. Here’s a part of it…

I have been blogging for over a year now. I started out wanting to spread God’s peace, and I would often share what God was doing in my life that created peace within me. I would unexpectedly get something really good from God during my day and I couldn’t wait to share it! It was a kind of spiritual high and I wanted it as much as I could get it. That should have been a warning…

At some point in my search for more of that Spiritual high, my focus shifted off of waiting for God to place something on my heart to share and pointed instead to trying to share often enough so that others would notice. Others were posting daily, with hundreds of women being influenced: why couldn’t I do the same?

Unfortunately, influence is not something you can manufacture. I tried to, and that’s where I got lost. Or rather, where I wandered off from God’s plan for me to use the influence He has given me.

Here’s the thing. We have all been given some kind of influence. We are an influence in our marriages, with our children, in our families, in our homes, in our communities and our careers. When we seek to follow God’s plan for our lives, committing to allowing His will to prevail not only do we have peace, but our influence resonates with purity:

“Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him and he will do this:
He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him…” (Psalm 37:5-7)

When we seek to build our own influence or try to mirror someone else’s (that nasty comparison bug), we get weary from trying to manufacture it on our own, become bitter when it doesn’t “work,” and may even get our priorities out-of-order because we spend too much time working on it.

What have I learned?

Living in God’s plan for influence brought me peace. Trying to manufacture it has stolen it.
Focusing on celebrating and promoting the success of my fellow sisters in Christ who are using their God-given influence in His way is a much better use of my time than envying them.
Be careful of the Spiritual high. It is only incredible when it comes straight from God himself.
Wait patiently for direction from God himself. Bitterness and weariness come from trying to move in my own strength.

What will you do with this? Will you search your heart to see if your weariness is because you are trying to create influence rather than allowing God to use you to influence those around you? Will you look to see if you are experiencing bitterness from comparing instead of celebrating? Will you choose to wait patiently for the Lord’s direction instead of moving without him?

Action Steps:

If you discover that the answer to any of the questions above is “yes,” take some time confessing what’s been going on in your heart with God. Then, depending on which question(s) you answered yes to, consider trying…

(1) Going out of your way to allow God to work through you in a particular area. For me it will mean not posting a blog until I have something “downloaded” from God to share.

(2) To make an effort to promote someone else, especially if you have a public influence (like a ministry, blog, etc.) For me this will mean you will begin reading about women who I believe are allowing God to use His influence through them.

(3) Examining your daily quiet times. I believe I was looking for that Spiritual High because I was feeling like God’s presence was missing. For me, this will mean creating a different quiet time where I am quieter and listening more for His voice.

(4) Ditching a regular plan of attack for a project you are working on and instead only do what God places in front of you. For me this will mean daily committing the time I have to devote to ministry development to God, asking Him to give me something to do rather than coming to Him to bless my to-do list.
If you are struggling with trying to create your own influence too, I hope you are comforted by the fact that we are not alone in this. If you have any questions about this, please don’t hesitate to ask! I do not promise to have an answer to every question, but I am sure God will show us the way.

I am praying for you!

Stephanie